S3E13 Masterbacon

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The Dateable podcast is an insider's look into modern dating that the Huffington post calls one of the top ten podcast about love and sex. On each episode, we'll talk to real daters about. From sex parties to sex droughts, date fails a diaper fetishes and first moves to first loves. I'm your host Yue Xu, former dating coach turned dating sociologists. You also hear from my co host and producer Julie Krafchick as we explored this crazy dateable world.

And i move so i loves. We are excited. You've join us for an older episode. While our earlier seasons were all about dating in san francisco we quickly realize all the themes. Learnings are universal for all daters so we shifted to covering dating from all around the world as the seasons. Progress to the fun part. Is things happen. I san francisco the tech and counterculture capital of the world. We love for you to keep tuning in to our older episodes. But there's no set order to listen in so feel free to jump to more. Recent seasons are relevant episodes for you. Enjoy the show. The dateable podcast is hosted by me. I'm ua a former dating coach. In new york turned active data in san francisco on each episode. you'll hear commentary by my co host. Michael vargas fellow dating coach with a clinical psychology background. My producer julie craft chick and other surprise co host stay tuned until the end of the episode for fun dating fact presented by our partner lively a new dating app that uses videos to tell your story by the way we started a t shirt line. And we're pretty sure. These t shirts will make killer presents for the holidays so out on our website at dateable. Podcast dot com. Hey everyone welcome to another episode of dateable. Show that opens up a candid. Conversation about dating in san francisco we've been quite promiscuous with our co host lately. And this week we have harvey hei. Harvey the rebound. This might be that. was he. Stick around one they reverse sometimes the sexiest sex learning. We we want harvey to be are to be my co-host because harvey is a self proclaimed high-frequency data. What does that mean. It means that. I explore rapidly and very myself out and take a nap and declare bankruptcy which is delete all the apps and just go organic. It's really strange. High-frequency how many days per week. Well five sometimes double book but mostly the week ends or for friends. And the weekdays for day i what did i say i'm the opposite of harvey. I'm a low frequency data most of my dates convert into second third dates. I rarely go on a bunch of i states but i do a meyer people who have the time and energy to do high frequency dating. Because i think that's a great way to get to know what you like and what you don't like so today. We have a beautiful lady saying next to me. Meghan who is the founder of meat. Foxy dot com. She is a of life and dating coach. Meghan and i met for lunch for coffey a long time ago like months and months ago and we were kind of sharing dating stories and i thought my some of my dating stories or crazy and then she started sharing some of hers and i was like. Oh fuck like she wins. So what's the story for us today. Oh man well you know. I tend to enjoy really unique people both in my social and dating life and so the guys i've dated have been very very very unique on the last one was no exception. I moved to bali for a couple of years on. I was really happy. That live there on so i would go back and forth san francisco to bali to eat. Pray love kind of i went. You know i got laid off from my corporate tech job job and went travelling and just fell in love with the place. broke up with. The boyfriend moved back to bali and finding yourself went on an adventure. And i met this guy very cute looked a little like justin bieber seem pretty normal on the on the surface. But i find that when you do long distance like the freaky shit starts to come out. You know because. I would come back to san francisco and a week would go by you. Know we'd send messages. I miss you sexy pictures. It was all good. You know little sexy tog but then once like a month or six weeks go by things would start to get pretty freaky mostly mostly on his head. And i started to notice like the scott. This guy has a food fetish. like what. what is this stuff. I'd never seen before but you know sexual tension would build. We wouldn't be having sex for a while and so he would like outlet that with these like really freaky fantasies and so of course any any girlfriend redo. I'd share them with my girlfriends and they were like. Please break up with this guy so we can put them on the internet so funny. I had a personal favorite. You can kinda. i'll share it with your right now.

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He started out with some sexy photos of him. Like meghan showing me photos. Okay oh he does. Look like a dark dark-haired justin bieber he's he's like flexing for me and the and then the letter goes on to explain. How wow just so you know. I'm getting really into bodybuilding which is funny because he's like kind of a skinny guy so i'm getting really into body building and i just want to let you know it's getting me pumped up. I think i need to write you the sexy letter so i'll share a little excerpt from the letter i hope it's not like to an appropriate His voice for the show. Yeah i'll speak. Uh speaking in his notes. I'm going to skip to like the good parts. You would be cooking eggs. While i'm fucking you from behind and then right away when they're done you shut off the stove and i'd come inside you and just hold you shortly afterwards. We'd bring the eggs into bed and feed them to each other. And then i would go down on you. I know you might think to yourself but you have egg breath baby. I have breath but nothing in the world can stop me from eating your pussy right now. I'd continue to eat your pussy. We'll have a finger inside you looking around for your g spots then i'd make you And i'd cuddle you. You have a surprise for you. I'd walk out outside and come right back. In seconds later with a full rack of steaming bacon and the little camp i was waiting for the vacant and a little dip in cup of maple syrup. You would start reaching for the bacon. And i would say wait a minute and i would wrap my dick with bacon and dry maple syrup all over and make you eat the bacon off of it. They can check. When you're done eating the bacon off my cock. I'd go down on you again in my cock back inside you fuck you really slowly until we both came then we would fall asleep and wake up and say well. That was crazy. Love you time was so spotted. Dick spotted dick is love. You love you. Yes so needless. To say breakfast has never been the same for me. Have you guys ever acted this out. We have not. And i called him afterwards inside. Nev was that for real. Like we're we're you serious. And he was like. Oh yeah you guys eat breakfast in the same room after. Oh yeah we. We had several breakfast but never dick related breakfasts. I have a really important question who made the day can. That's a great question. He probably did before because he planned it all out and his freaky sexual fantasies should be more explicit about that right. He should have read it out. Like i previously had cooked bacon an hour and a half before i had are hired help. Cook the bacon So when you first said that he was really into like foodstuff as fetish. I thought it was like in certian of food or like playing around with food. I didn't realize it was actually cooking. And then fucking breath how. That's a really nice one. He's talked about like dripping. Maple syrup on me or honey. But i always thought that would be too sticky stickier weird you know it was like i don't think that's actually sexy only in fantasy land but he was actually into that he's like no. I really want that to happen. In fact he added another fantasy where he like hung up hotdogs. And i'd be like hotdogs like this feeling. I am and i had to like go after them like bobbing for apples but like bite into them. We're like suck on them like bite into them. I don't know. I can't naked actual mind. Yeah like be all sexy and like naked and like sexy eating hot dogs if you can pull that off. I don't know so. And i'm a pretty sexually liberated open minded person so i always was like cool. Play into your fantasies. that's all right. How long have you been dating before. He revealed that cheap ever together about eight months Before that how many of those months were long distance probably like two or three of the month long distance and then the rest was togetherness time very interesting would have come out no matter what expedited by the distance. I don't know if you've ever done long distance but you can get pretty sexually frustrated and your mind goes crazy places. You're just like everything starts looking sexy. Apparently hot dogs. Hot dogs are sexy. Did you notice anything from like your first date or second day like the way he handled food or italy. He looked at you. You're eating you know around breakfast time morning. Sex was a thing but No no no signs that he was like a weird like food fetish kind of guy was food always involved with sex. No not always but was sex. Always better with food around. Probably for him. My girlfriend's jokes. They were like meghan. You need to write him a letter back like he could be nacho man. You could write a nacho fantasy about how like you want to be human nachos you wrote anything you got an awesome fantasy about.

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I know it's just ridiculous so he never date a vegetarian. Definitely not disqualifier for him. That's off again. We met in bali. We just happen to be staying in the same vacation house and was why was he in bali. He was there. Here's an interesting story. He was on the run from the law. Actually see stealing food. He wasn't he got in trouble like doing some. You know bad boy is about boy doing things he shouldn't do. When you say you fall for your day you need people. I'm not gonna say fall for all of them boys categories. I have in the past person bad boys but now in my mature older age i i i like guys who are unique and different but not in the bad boy way. I've learned to differentiate the two still unique still their own people but they don't have to be lawbreakers or food. what are we saying. Food take food fetish people's sexiest sexy foods sexiest swedish. No that's not hot. There's no there's nothing is nothing. Not at all yeah. I was not turned on by his initial letter. But i was very amused. Judy break up with them. Because of it. I didn't did eventually break up with him. But it wasn't because of that i came back to san francisco and i realize this is where my businesses this is where my family is so i called him and broke up with him over skype. Bit of addict move. Chemo's just have your actions all the time going through like ballparks you know whole foods kitchens blood flow redirecting from his brain. He's just like hard on it. Did you ever ask him where this fetish came from. How did he discover it. I asked him about it. I was like wait. Are you for real. And he said yeah. I really liked that. And he said. I just really love food. You know like food. If i eat good food. It's just really turns me on like me hard. maybe i'm super vanilla. I just don't like to play around food in bed. Because i don't like crumbs in bed and then have to change my sheets. I'm thinking about like if he ate eggs egg breath and he went down on you. Are there like egg particles in your pussy and like how do you clean that shit out. So then you couldn't be converted to like messy sex. 'cause there's something to be said for people who were like so horny so turned on. They just want anytime. There's a fetish for that. In fact i had a friend tell me the other day that they went to burning man and there was a gay guy there who was like how to sign on that said i will suck your dirty pliant disgusting unclean dusty shaved cock benesch thing like it's so dirty but it doesn't higher because i'm so turned on right now that i want it anyway. Yeah i guess we can't completely rationalized fetish right. They come from somewhere. I get the concept of throwing it down and you wear and having a rough law sex like that's really hot. But i'm i'm in my mid thirties. I like to think about the aftermath. What am i cleaning up here right. Am i going to get a ut. I don't want it. I should gonna hot tubs or not hot tubs. Bacon bacon all that grease all hell no to my doctor. How did you get allows flooding some bacon wrapped around his. Keita's want to explain that. I don't wanna smell like a big mac for two. We not worth of fetish question when someone writes their fetish to the action. Want to do the exact thing that they right or they just announcing to you. Hey i'd like to have sex round breakfast. If it gets a little weird that'd be cool. That's a hard thing to say. Because there's this weird different there's like a fantasy world and there's reality and to me. That's what's fun about fantasies. Is you can do anything up in your own mind. You know like you can go anywhere and then if you talk about it does mean you actually want to do those things. Sometimes not a lot of girls have gang bang fantasies but then they're like oh no i don't actually wanna get fucked by ten guys at once but in my mind that's really hot. That's such a great point because if you look at like porn history you'd be like squirrels. Yeah what is your whatever's in your head as a little different than what you're able to in real life beavers defense that'd be great actually was johnson. He's thinking of you. He wants to have sex with you. And he's maybe having breakfast and she's like what can i do with all this breakfast food too much better than bacon. So if he's like comparing me or sex with bacon supplement. It wisely not a category.

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Let me look. At porn of categories of youth porn. We've got like lesbian pantyhose. Amateur brunette. latina. Where's the beacon shaken masturbation female voucher interest bacon. They could take warn fetish bacon. I japanese seed japanese. Always have it down. Oh no i don't know what that is. I don't wanna look at that. Oh shit look that bacon wrapped on these tidbits. These bacon bikini not. That's different. She you talked to him since. Oh yeah definitely. In fact after i broke up with him a funny story to like a few weeks ago he was. He message me. He's like megan. I have a big problem. I need you to help me solve it. I lost all the pictures of your boobs. Might computer got stolen. And i really have been having fantasies about you. I need you to send me some new ones. What and then he sends me another message and says because it's not fair that i lost those so it'd would be great because in all caps. Yeah and it's like a thirteen year old boy like speaking me. I was like you know. I have a boyfriend now. I'm probably not going to send you pictures of my boobs Don't google drivers try an password. Secure the most disorganized. Yeah this food. Faddish thing is nasty to me so when i was in new york i had a few girlfriends who made a living from playing out and one of them was this guy would regularly take her out to dinner. Okay this is like her weekly client. He would take her out to dinner and they have like a nice five course meal together and then the part. That's the fetishizes part is a. He watched her do the five courses again so she would have ten courses in one night. Gluttony fetish gluttony fetish. But he he would then go home jerk off they would never have any sexual contacts cashew so tired in big if she got to finish what turn him off with like you're disgusting. I just don't even want you. And we talked about this before on previous episodes. It's i admire people who have fetishes. That are kind of fringe because of them when they find someone who has the same fetish. They're going to fall in love right away. You know you need to wear it on your sleeve. otherwise you're never going to find someone else who appreciates it so good job way to bust out your bacon dick so now we're on the topic of fetishes again and we've talked about this before. But what are your fetishes with megan. Minor boring i like. I like to be dominated. We hear that one a lot. I'm that i'm a pretty high power woman. I like to take charge of a career my thing but then the bedroom. I want someone else to take charge. Yeah so like manhandling to lego bedia. sim Light staff. you know. i'm sure. I'm pretty game for almost anything. I'm a big try. Anything once kind of person except the begin But yeah i like. I like to be controlled. I like to be out of control. Have you ever tried out a fetish other than the bacon. One that you were like. Oh hell no. I'm never doing that again not yet. There's one wants to try though i like. I like the idea of pretending to meet a partner for the first time at a bar role play. Yeah i like that like. Oh i'm just meeting you and then pretending to be super easy like oh this guy can just gaming characters so hard hard roll place pursuant other like strangers. Come into the state you know. Yeah but it's so much fun when you play out. My friend went into a wig store. She just out of curiosity. She asked like one of the people who work there. She's like who's your biggest customer here like. Who who buys the most whigs and she said mostly men buying for their wives like role. Play is so huge that they actually dominate the whig industry. I'm personally a big proponent of monogamy for myself. I don't care what other people do but i like it a partially because it's like a dying breed of relationship you know. Just go ask. But i think role playing is a great way to maintain that because you can explore things together and evolve your sexuality as a partnership piano. You can do new things. There are no rules. And i think that's a great way to maintain it and keep things interesting so people say it's just you can't get satisfied by one person i think you can. If you're creative enough. So i agree. I don't think people use it enough variety in their relationship. Try hard enough avenue that a lot of monogamous. Don't go down because it's they're so traditional. Yeah those stigma attached to a lot of fetishes. How many people do a fetish and be like. Oh that was so terrible.

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If it just doesn't work it doesn't work exactly. Isn't that one of the beautiful things about partnership though and monogamy is that it's a safe space. You can try things and if it goes weird you're just like ask crap that move onto something else and there's no judgment because this is someone that you really care about in that you have something special story. It's going to be exactly. It should be a safe space though. And as long as you have that then there are no rules and then things can get really exciting. I think i also think that one of the most exciting parts of partnership is discovering new. Fetishes together exactly like light to heavy fetishes harvey. Do you have any fetishes. Since i met you everything about food like could i say anyone that knows me knows that i absolutely infatuated pesto. It's like it's like the best. Food group ever created so bathtub. Full of pesto. Oh my god would be. I don't know do there'd be the best or the worst thing ever but like yeah. Would surf boarding is right. Have you heard me say sorry. No can case the bridge crucifix where the girls riding on top of. The guy has to agree. That might do it for me if you had some like. Fresh made pasta being thrown into the mix. And then it's all going onto a plate and then afterwards you have all this crazy sex and then you get to eat this freshman pasta with pesto the bathroom so concerned about cleaning up it's fine. He's cleaning maybe for you though. They're like herbs that could be like that could be eastern better might be tightening. And maybe this is the close-mindedness w candle bobble it up and sell it as vaginal rejuvenation. Japan oh my gosh. So the same girl. No from new york. Who did the five course meal. She also had another client who drew a bath for her. And then he wrapped her naked body in cellophane and put her in the bathtub and then he cut up carrots and celery and put in the bathtub and he had salt and pepper and had a giant spoon and he drank bathwater. Human human human broth bone broth. Yes and she said. She fell asleep in the bathtub and he was like really turned on by this. She got paid to be wrapped in cellophane naked. And take a bath. I have a girlfriend who liked to be wrapped in cellophane and he would like when she robbed him in cellophane and then we'd just sit in front of him and paint her toenails. And like do monday activities. Jim insulting and that was his king. He just loved it so tra non-cage and she'd have to give him water because it makes you sweat a lot so like you need to be hydrated at one of these people have their own podcast where they talk about us. Oh my god my friend. She likes to have sex missionary style on a bed with clean sheets. It's disgusting how does she do it. I encourage everyone to explore freaky side. Because that's what makes life fun. That's what makes sex fund explore your freaky side and there's nothing worse than being laughed at for your sexual kings. That's like the number one relationship killer in my opinion if you're like open and you're doing your thing and then someone laughs at you done. Never again boehner killer julie. Do we have You have a question of the day. Word is actually super relevant julie. Our esteemed producer has a question of the day. Not that relevant case. This came from jennifer. My wants me to talk dirty in the bedroom. But i feel so uncomfortable. What are some good lines tips to do this. In a more subtle way that will turn them on. Oh man it's blushing. Maybe we should here one for each person. I just like to swear a lot. Yeah i like that. I don't know that i would advise her. Ask herself. what are the things that she gets. The most turned on by and to write those things down and then figure out different ways to say those things and while they're happening to say them because they're real that's not a far stretch from reality. She can be like. this is what i like. This is what's happening. yeah into him. That will probably be dirty talk. And it'll be hot for both of them and it's not too far of a stretch. Maybe what's your thoughts from mill right with you on this communication thing and almost anything that a woman says is sexy when you're having sex because there's so many women that are silent or post to silent in bed. Oh and that's the worst right easily. They'll want to hear you can just say like this feels good or like something like right there. Anything every once in a while so sexy you almost think out loud you know you. Just say what you're thinking what you're feeling and that's hot to the person you're you're having sex with any other words of advice we can give to our listeners about beginner dirty talk.

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Have you ever gone this question from any of your clients. You know guys. Don't ask a lot about dirty talk. They ask more about if women enjoy sex. It's not crazy uliaski serious. They really wanna know. I don't know maybe more than thirty dirty talk but no not a lot of questions about dirty talk. How would how would this person know how. How would they know if a woman enjoys sex. Well i'm a big communication person. That's at the core of what i teach so you could just ask. You know it'd be like was that good for you. You know easy for you. What about the women. That don't communicate as much well as a guy. It's good if you take a lead to get them to feel comfortable communicating those things. So maybe you lead by example and say wow. That was really good for me. I loved it. You did this this and this. That turned me on. What about you. is that good for you. And then it gives them a framework through which to answer so they feel comfortable opening up. Great okay let's talk about meet foxy dot com. Yeah you know. It's huge passion business for me crazy people person. I love to meet new people. So i've been dating coach for ten years now have helped thousand guys from around the world which is awesome. Now help women as well. And i really teach people how to bring out their most attractive qualities so they can meet the people who are good for them in business contexts in professional whatever social romantic. Whoever you wanna meet how can you just be yourself me. Good people be extroverted and bring those people into your life. So got workshops monthly programs. What's the number one tip you can give to people who want to attract the right person. Yeah absolutely. I think the best intention when you're meeting new people is just to be curious instead of trying to get something from anyone. Just try to tap into your own curiosity. What do you want to know about that person. What do you need to know. In order to know that you'd want to spend more time with that person go with the intention of finding that out and people will be open and receptive instead of putting up blocks and and being creeped out by trying to get something from them. So be curious instead of trying to get something and you're gonna meet a lot more people debris some bacon and we and dipping of. You're really great. If you wanna learn more about meghan you can go. Her website. meet fox dot com. That's f. o. x. I e. dot com and the listeners. At home if you wanna share some of your fetishists. This is one of my favorite topics because dude like freaky is great. I love freaky people. But we want to hear about your fetishes. We wanna hear about what turns you on maybe dirty talking and we want to hear about people who are maybe in the initial stages of discovering their fetishes. That's kind of interesting to not flake broadcast to the world. Be loud and brown and on that note on the three one two three say. Ps we want to wish everyone. A happy thanksgiving. Here's a dating fact brought to you by lively a new video dating app and we have cat from lively here can do you have any facts around food and sex by chance. Well oddly enough we do. So we compiled a lot of research and studies and we found that there are certain foods that increase your hormone levels yes and create that feeling that mimics sensations of sex ou our eggs and sausages on this list Finding enough no. They're not on this list. But we have some other foods that you might. Yes okay notes. Yes so the first one is kind of choice tres. Oh yeah we've all heard that one. i mean. Just look at it looking that way sir you you know why come on now. Yeah the second. One chili peppers really spicy rate heats. Up your inside the third one coffee also another one. I don't think super attractive. And i think maybe in the morning you need coffee before you. That's true that's more to get your stamina exactly Okay the next one is interesting. One avocado yes. I love avocados. Yeah i know. When i saw this i was like okay. I'm totally game. Ring are avocado. i would just dayton avocado on the so much. I love him so much. So beautiful and finally think this on brings us back to the comment. The last food bananas. oh Yeah yeah mean look at it.

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Cool love the less no eggs on this list surprisingly or not surprisingly thanks cat and things lively for that dating back videos. Tell your story better. Download the lively dating app today at go lively app. Dot com to connect with us visit dateable. Podcast dot com. You can also find us on facebook twitter and instagram. All under dateable podcasts.