BONUS: Our 2021 Dating Predictions

00:00:01 - 00:05:10

The Dateable podcast is an insider's look into modern dating that the Huffington post calls one of the top ten podcast about love and sex. On each episode, we'll talk to real daters about. From sex parties to sex droughts, date fails a diaper fetishes and first moves to first loves.  I'm your host Yue Xu, former dating coach turned dating sociologists. You also hear from my co host and producer Julie Krafchick as we explored this crazy dateable world.

Hello everyone welcome to another episode of dateable a show all about modern dating where we dig a little bit deeper than just stories. We want to get to the bottom of why people behave the way they do. Including your own behaviors. This is our second bonus episode while still in the off season so you just got us but we have re a really great episode planned out for you because we're doing predictions dating predictions for twenty twenty one who doesn't watch us. God thank you. Thank you my own limiting beliefs. That people may be just. Don't wanna hear from us but yeah this is going to be really fun. We did this. Twenty twenty one of these prediction episodes. And i think some stuff actually ironically came true. We didn't dicked more video. Deavere that we we did that. We did not predict covert and we did not know. That video ad surged because of. But i'd already cova. That's true even nikki nova who we talked to. That's a medium. Said that like she would never have predicted kobe. era so i will give some credit that that is one of those things that no one could have predicted but i excited to do our twenty twenty one because we have a little more insight this year you know unfortunately on january first things did not get one hundred percent better. I think we all knew that that it was to just go away. So yeah we're we're going to look at dating trance with a covid viewpoint here and you know. We'll do like a mix of predictions for still pre vaccine and impose vaccine. 'cause i can't also be very different trends by. We'll won't take account into all of those situations. But julian are coming off of high. 'cause we just saw each other at the after not seeing each other for a really long time weeks. Yeah six weeks. At least. Because i left six weeks ago so maybe even longer longer. I think it's been probably yeah. It's a really long time and it just happened to be a gorgeous day san francisco. We sat out in the park super. Save with our masks on too. So that's on the record but it was really nice to see each other and just shoot the shit. I forget what it's like to just shoot the shit with someone. It's hard to video because you don't like over video you're staring at each other. It's not like oh did you hear about so. And so because it. Doesn't you feel like you have to fill in Have dead air but in person you can have to silence and then be like. Oh i just remember this. Yep and you don't need to talk about our baby dateable what's no. Oh my gosh we forgot about. Oh we did talk about janice getting your sweatshirt. that was the one thing that's come up but yes we did not talk about our baby but like any healthy relationship. Sometimes you got to put yourself. I recognize. I know we let our baby serving. That's okay just for one day for the sake of our own relationship. We need quality time together. How hot did look in our sweat shirts. so hot. we make any supermodel. The reason why janice came up china's you're listening the reason you came up as we were with a couple other friends to was like whoever was rocking that like she didn't know janice she's like whoever was rocking that sweatshirt on your instagram and really sold that socially distant yet emotionally available. One and i wanna get one now. So that's a lot to sell sweat shirt. Swisher looked odd hot and it is acted janice. Let me know. This is her first sweatshirt. She's ever owned. I'm like girl. where have you been. It's kovin. I have a whole closet of sweat shirts now. I know i'm really tempted to buy myself one of those. I feel like that thing looked really comfortable and really nice. So it's that's why it's cozy and the colors are really great. Yeah thanks remodeling that for us. Yeah i mean shameless plug again for our merged store but definitely get on it. We're gonna do this thing that you know. Every so often will keep some of like the tried and true designs than really are like the ones that everyone really loves. but we're going to rotate new stuff in and out and we're also going to do a crowd sourced experiment we got. This idea will give a credit jasmine one of our members. She had this idea to like crowd source of you. Know like merch slogans. Because there's been so many great ones like masturbating or You know i. I'll give us credit for zuhdi calls because we actually know it came under our it so there is a request through zuhdi calls on march.

00:05:10 - 00:10:07

So we're gonna do a crowd source kind of like who could come up with the best slogan and they'll win some sort of merch and it will also be available for everyone else to get on it too. I never thought that we would become t shirt designers. But this is our job with with dateable. It's really cool because it helps. Because we're i think we're both creative people. And now we get to exercise that part of our brain and julie's impeccable with design because she is a designer by trade so we have these wonderful designs up on the merge store. Definitely check that out if you haven't yet yep dateable podcast dot com slash shop. That's our own plug. Yup at another plug that will do is sounding board. We've had so many amazing. I mean the group is growing like it was. Yeah it's been wonderful to see everyone like we've been getting a lot of the people that have been regulars in the love the love in the time of corona group. Which is the free group. So i think there has been a little bit of confusion. The free group look for love in the time of corona. You still do need to cut alike. Tell us who you are. So we don't let total ranya but then the sounding board is really worth things. Take a take it up a notch. We have the dateable after show with logan yuri. Who is the director of relationship. Science at hinge like. She's writing a book that's coming out. We're going to have her back on the podcasts. And getting ready for that. But i was thinking about it after an unlike you a you and i take this for granted like how many cool people were able to talk to this podcast. But i'm like this is pretty frigging cool that like people were able to like interact with someone like logan in this like intimate setting. Like where else can you do stuff like that. So we have daughter. Abigail left this month coming up which is going to be amazing so i think it was our top performing episode. It was how you're wired for relationships. All about schema so again like who can like it. Amazing opportunity to be with these people have such high caliber and also we just launched this event. We're going to do in february. it's going to be called the most dateable competition. Twenty twenty one. I hate using the word pageant. But we couldn't think of a better word is a co coed competition you'll go through rounds including talent and q. And a. where we will crown one person as most dateable for twenty twenty one so you have to be in our facebook group in order to see all the details and to submit your video. We are making decisions. By the end of january of six candidates that will go on to compete in the final round so excited. And that's gonna be our february avenge for the sounding board members so if you're sounding board member and we have to tears that go to events for them like he'll be free and then for everyone that's at the france level will like have some sort of upgrade. That's cheaper than if you were to tickets as a one off. So if you've been kind of considering sounding board this could be a good intro to an event but also if you're like a basically ready to go you'll you'll be getting a better deal if you actually just joined the sounding board so again dateable. Podcast dot com slash sounding board giving you all the url dateable podcast dot com. It's all there what i love about. This group is something might idle. Tim ferriss said some so do she. To say tim ferriss. Mind really is thought may lee was your idol. My yeah she. She's who i want to be. Tim ferriss as like the voice. I have in my head all the time. And he says this. And it's just i think it's so compelling he says spend your life talking to people who get it instead of trying to convince people who don't get it. Oh god and love. Our community is because everyone gets if you give them. The group look at discussions. You're like these are my peeps. I don't need lane who i am. It's like people just get it. That's laws group. I know now it's like holding me too high of a standard. What i meet people. That aren't at the like emotional. Iq is a word we hear all the time or e q. I feel like now when i meet people. That aren't at the same level as our people in the tampa kuroda and sounding board. I'm like can you just be like them. Yeah just join our group and get influence exactly. That's basically what it is. I love the us. You're talking about like a movie that you were watching it. You're like it kind. What was it like the sex club on your like no the vow on hbo. Max oh people are going to judge me the vow the vow. A documentary about sex nexium. It is started as a leadership development program landmark like tony robbins as well so you get the way they get you.

00:10:07 - 00:15:04

Which is i think. It's legit is that they help you get over your limiting believes and they help you really accept yourself to move forward. Reach your full potential. I was like this is the same shit we talk about in a sounding board except the sex part. We we don't do a we haven't we haven't explored that part of our business yet. We just got too much but maybe sex call be next for twenty twenty two starts a sex call. Just kidding we'll be like a like a vid pod sex cult we got we got like quarantine together but then we just freely have sexually each other. It's not a genius. There's a name for these they're called fuck pods. I didn't know this pass. only tiffany. Haddish had to tell us all about that in had netflix special. Would your beloved departed. Years party one. Beloved nosair yes. Yes that was a great a great special things for tiny onto that julie. It's a it's a special on that flakes where seven comedians get up at. The scene is like a funeral and now saying goodbye to one thing from twenty twenty and it's just hilarious is so funny but yeah tiffany. Haddish's was casual sex. Basically like dow. I found myself in a relation. Also we won't give it all away guy should check it out sex pods ed. What should i be insulted. That i haven't been invited ten seconds and this one girl's like to i know like that's the point. I'm sorry who has watched it. You're probably like what the fuck are they talking about. This makes no sense. Or if you are a sex pod please reach out because we love to have you on the podcast next season. We should try to find someone. I'd love to talk about sex pods in all serious. We we've got it feedback from some people that they want more sex topics alike. Let's hear mike who has some good ones like we've gone to virtual sex parties we've done real life sex parties but lake sex pods like maybe there's some other stuff out there like let's let's hear it from you all. It's not a bad idea. I'm telling you it's not yeah. Call six pod tomato tomato but we will be talking about sex in our predictions. We're gonna we're gonna kick them off right now. We have five main ones of course are other predictions. We made before we get into our predictions gears. A message from our sponsor magic spoon. I really love that. The current trend is all about healthy eating. But i have to cutting down on carbs and sugar has been especially difficult for me so when i heard about a serial with zero sugar. Eleven grams of protein and only three net grams of carbs in each serving. I was like Sold y'all this not magic. This is magic spoon of delicious tasting. Cereal that is almost too good to be true about. I've already given out like five boxes to friends. Because i'm like please trying to stop talking about it today right. I was trying to sell it to our friend because there are four yummy flavors. Cocoa fruity frosted and blueberry tall kito friendly gluten-free green. Free soy free low carb. Gmo free and frankly guilt free. I'm currently loving the blueberry flavor because it tastes like a summer day after the rain. You know what i mean. So i know that you guys wanna get on this so go to magic spoon dot com slash dateable to grab a variety pack and try it today and be sure to use our promo code dateable checkout to save five dollars off your order and magic spoon is so confident in their product. It's backed with a one hundred percent happiness guarantee so we don't like it for any reason they'll refund your money. No questions asked again. That's magic spoon. Dot com slash. Dateable for five dollars off. This episode is also brought to you by better. Help our sponsor for the new year. What are some things that you like to change in your life to find more happiness. Maybe you what do you think is preventing you from achieving your goals. The simple answer is prioritizing. Your mental health. We adaptable are huge. Fans of therapy and better help can match you with your own licensed therapists and connect you in a safe and private online environment. I was able to start communicating with my therapist in less than forty eight hours with better help. They're committed to facilitating great therapeutic matches and more affordable than traditional offline counseling. They're licensed professionals specialize in everything from new year resolutions and stress anxiety trauma depression grief and for the new year. We wish for all of you to live your happiest life. That's why as a listener you'll get ten percent off your first month by visiting our sponsor at better help dot com slash dateable. Join over one million people who have taken charge of their mental health again. That's better help. Spelled h. e. l. p. dot com slash dat ab l. e. again. This is no magic. Eight ball is just seeing all the behaviors and patterns from the previous year.

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We think this is the aftermath of two thousand twenty and dating will be like in twenty twenty one in the context of vaccine and post vaccine so he and post so. Let's start with the first one. This is this is just such a normal prediction. It's like a given video days will become a normal thing. It's it's part of the process before you just message online and then you meet up in person. Now there's another step of video and before people were very shy about video and now become a norm that it's part of the process of dating. Now i mean i love it. I actually started off via. Like i don't know because i had some like earlier video dates that i just felt like they felt so awkward right and i'm like i don't wanna like we have this whole discussion. I remember asking you like. Hey like didn't feel great about it on video but like maybe it's video like a medium. It was just hard to tell. But i've actually had some. That have had a lot of like chemistry through video. And i think it's totally possible. Yeah it's not gonna be fireworks for say like it's not like you can have that physical touch and all that but i think you can really gauge. If there's something there and it just makes you a lot more excited to meet up in real life. And i think that's what was missing for modern datings that everyone was so like disposable and expendable and now i know i was guilty of it at some point that like i was like. I don't even save this person's name like at my phone. I may never see them again. Like what's the point. Even doing that is a terrible attitude. I would much rather have less states but go in excited about who. I'm actually meeting. It just means that i. Irl dates will become more coveted. So there is a ramp up to meeting up in person and videos par that ramp up so that you meet with people in real life but those people are the ones you're really excited about. I also love that. Most people now have a ring light. An external microphone like everyone has their virtual video date thing down there like oh need this background totally angle of so much more comfortable with it now to that i was like before like video in general but i think everyone's getting there like it's definitely like for work to people in their work. Lives like for us. Podcast we have to do it video but even like just like office jobs. Like video is the norm. So thing but yeah. I think it's a good thing. Because i don't know if this is on yearly departed to. I've just been watching too much net flicks by at for six weeks. But i'm back now. Obviously but i like it was something guys watching their like. Who has time to put on makeup. Get dressed like go across town to like meet someone that could be a total dud. And it's true it's like the so much time and that's what gets people. Burnt out on defeating is when they kind of sure. Ning one after another and things don't ever seem to work out. So i would so much rather you know like with zoom you can put on virtual makeup but even just putting like bear bait makeup on getting dressed from the waist op is backload. Easier right yeah. You don't have to account for the time. The commute time of getting there. You don't have to worry about how you smell like. It's just so much easier to do. Virtual dates and i also feel like if those people who are reluctant to do video dates are going to have less dates in twenty one totally believe that totally or even the good old fashioned phone like there's something about even starting their they get ready at all. It's wonderful and then if there's chemistry there then you can upgrade to a video day. But i think what i'm starting to see twenty twenty one. Now there were at the very start. Is that people. Don't wanna do like endless video dates right right. I think it's like let's do one. Let's screen let's see if this is like has some potential in if so then let's meet up the gonna meet up with every last person but we're not going to spend our lives on video like like even okay like san francisco at la or like probably the most extreme that nothing's open but even there in those places like you can still go to a park or do something. And i think in other places. Although i will say other places have weather not working for them. California by be shut shutdown right now but we have weather in our favor that makes it a lot easier to do stuff so maybe people in like places that are cold might do more video dates to like at least see. If it's worth taking that risk to meet someone like in an indoor capacity. Yeah some ways. Safer and speaking of safety shall we go onto our second produce safety. I come odd verse. Dateable is all about safety. Kids vaccination ges on online dating profiles.

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We've already seen them with the political badges. Now we think there's going to be testing badges. Have i been vaccinated. Am i going to get vaccinated. And this will become very polarizing political and people will condemn each other for whatever they choose but at least four. Whatever you choice you do make with the vaccination. You will feel very strongly about. You can't be like middle of the road for something like this. Go either way if someone sticks a needle in my body. Whatever i give accident. It's not you have to make a conscious choice. Absolutely i think like i mean yeah i think people are going to put it in their profile for schirn like i think they will come out like maybe there will be a badge like i can see like bumble had like the type of data. Are you comfortable with like video for socially distanced. So i could definitely see a badge being created but i think people are going to spell it out or it's gonna be a very early conversation starter for sure. I think that really. I mean there's a lot in terms of just like the safety and comfort but also just like how you view the world in like what there's a lot that's interesting there. Well this whole testing and vaccination movement will open up this entire like testing sort of mentality so people are going to get tested for sti tested for this this and that because they want the. It's nice having the power to know your results. And i think that's what like the cova. Testing has trained us to do is wanting to know what is happening in our body. Yeah so we also put up a poll question and poll in our facebook group in addition to you and i coming up with our predictions and alexa also wrote daters will sti testing more seriously because they realized the power of testing power knowing these results. So i think a lot of people are think thinking that way for sure. Yeah it's good to know right you wanna know either way and now. Personal safety is a priority. We know that now and with kovic you realize you start seeing your your consequences now. No it's contagious. And you know. Your health can impact someone else's health. Yeah i mean. I think also just like i like at variance this recently. That i'm like. I could do a socially distance date but i feel like there is still like an awkwardness to it like. You're not really do some like the touch chicken like the stuff that you would do before and the signals that you would say that way. So i feel like having the task could at least put you at ease to kind. Act more like you did in pre covid times when the vaccine even more to that shows that you care about the other person that you're going on a date with all right. It's a sign of respect. I really think so. Then our our third prediction yeah. Let's move on so meeting people online. That's not through these dating apps. I know everyone's still on the apps. But i think through quarantine people have noticed there many other ways to meet people that could turn into romantic relationships. That aren't branded as dating. Yup i think this is a big one and we actually said this at our earlier predictions or we did it on the episode with jordan abraham about like just stayed in general. I think was on our earlier predictions too. But we talked. About how like apps. Start to simulate real life a bit more you know and i think we have seen that especially now where virtual is the way of life like we've seen it in our facebook group. I think that's been one of the most you know like doing the weekly happy hours like a way that one of our members i forget who said this was like it's like like shalah lied because you could like jump. Yeah like by that. Go that far but yes like there is like it was kind of like a house party that you could jump into different rooms and you know like if felt like that and we. We talked to a few people on episodes last year like we had captured. Who talked about meeting someone on clubhouse which is an app that's really blowing up people. Discussing apparently One girl like put herself in a room and was like who wants to date be if people could come in it was incredible and audio only audio only but people are using it for dating which is incredible and then tiktok we had our couple that met through tiktok start of season eleven. So people are definitely using this. I mean people have always kind of crept into dm's on facebook and instagram. But i think it's even more now because dating apps are not for everyone. I personally still think they are a great way to meet people. You would not have that. I get that. There's a lot of notes like this.

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There is a toxic side that really drained. Certain people who who and i can see why people don't want to like put themselves out there too as like a personal ad like i think it is different. People have different comfort with it but at the reality is it's very difficult to meet people in real life and it probably is going to be through twenty twenty one like with the vaccine coming out. I can't imagine people like coming up and being in each other's faces match with strangers and like being like super like seductive people they've never met nelson feel like that's gonna happen anytime soon so i do think that we're going to start to like find more and more of these avenues that feel like real life that are online and it's a relief to know that online dating is not the end all be all to meet people is just one avenue and you've gotta diversifying your portfolio. You know what. I mean salihi. Exactly i mean i think people have said people always said it's good to meet people that have similar interests to. Yeah i think more interest based groups are going to start to pop up like meat like kinda like meet up but like online more. And i mean it up. I think has always been one of those things. That people say is a good idea in theory. It like doesn't translate as well. But i think with technology like you can actually start to filter people with similar values and interests and like do other things than just kind of a random. Let's all meet up with no background. And i think there could start to be like an explosion of apps that let people need off common interest but also other factors. It's all about community. And that's what nicky nobody. She predicted that for us to its community. That's how you're going to grow your brand and that's how you're going to grow your network to if you're dating so i really liked that prediction before we get to four and five. 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That's thrive c. a. u. s. e. medics dot com slash d. a. t. e. l. e. for fifteen percent off awesome. So let's get into those predictions so number four we think that hookup culture is coming back. Said fetching i dow in twenty twenty we said hookup culture has gone away but i. We think that people have had a lot of pent up sexual energy to make a lot.

00:30:02 - 00:35:01

I don't think it will come back like immediately. I think it will be post. Vaccines probably like part of the year. But i do think people are going to be a little more. Especially if they are cut discerning. The dates a little more on video to begin with. I think that sexist got happen in those early days because people quite frankly need the physical intimacy and touch. But it will. No i feel like with the hookup. Culture a won't be blurred lines. It will be very clear. Wins a hookup. In fact i think people will be like you know. I'm just in this. Were hooking up. I just i really just want aspects which is nice there are no mixed signals. Everyone sort of like wanting that affection so why not just put it out there yet or even if it does blossom into relationship i think just saxl will be on the table way earlier. Yeah that yeah. I see that. Yeah there is. I think people agree with this. There was someone in our group We're gonna we'll we'll go through some of the groups predictions after all sprinkle in a couple that are relevant. There was one about one person said like roaring twenties style day. And i feel like we've been saying this for a while so that came from sukanya But there is one about fuck boys that i wanna read. Oh i love talking about fox news. Things will be back. Julie are is making actually totally agree with what aaron put up here. Is that all the fuck boys are gonna come going to come out in full show this summer thinking they have the best summer ever but after over. A year of lockdown Away from them. women will walk the other way. Oh i agree. I think Back when there's a vaccine there'll be like yep. I can just come into people's lives at have casual ex and do whatever but i do think that like the work that we've all done isn't going to just magically disappear so i totally agree with that and i think like with this whole hookup culture coming back in it. Hook up. culture gets a bad rap like we always think like a negative to that. And i do think though it doesn't need to be a negative like if both people are on board and people are more like upfront about their feelings early on whether it's for casual sex or that they're just ready to like take the plunge into something. It doesn't have to be a bad thing. I don't think i don't. I don't actually think the fuck boys will come back in full force. I f- i feel like because we've been self isolating for so long that these fuck boys have been doing a lot of internal work and they're realizing. I'm only saying this because i've talked to fuck boys enduring this quick this time to be like how are you doing. Are you feeling. And they had feelings. They only had feelings and one guy admitted to me. he's like i realize i'm just really lonely. That's why i'm desperate for this kind of cat and mouse chase. But he he feels like he is seeing dating a little differently because he's connecting more with this feelings. I'm not saying all fucked. Boys have gone through this transformation but i think having that time of self isolation has helped a lot of them evolve. I do actually think that people are still going to be relationship minded even if hookup culture is back in the picture because i agree. I think the loneliness that a lot of people have felt have sean shed a light on the importance of relationships and i think that like i think things will just move faster like in with physical like i think things are moving fast now but not with the physical side always and i think that will just kinda start to catch up and come into that picture. Bit more well. That's a very nice way to transition to our last trend prediction for twenty twenty one right. Yeah of basically that signals are totally changing. Only totally it used to just be like three drinks and some lake touching for me. I'm like yeah i know. I know it's like it's also. I feel like on video dates like it's really hard to know how things are vibing. 'cause there's no signal at all with touch so i think it's really we're going to have to work on our verbal skills more. I think it's really nice when someone say on a video or even a text after like how good a time they had how excited they are to meet you. Whatever that may be like. I think we do need to rely on verbal which has been missing from dating people are always ear to say how they feel and put it out there and they play a dumb games and i think it could be a good thing that we have to rely on other senses a little more. It's such an unprecedented time. That people can't rely on those like dushi. Pick up artists to be like. Oh if he or she does this.

00:35:01 - 00:40:08

It means are interested right. Because we've never been in this predicament. Before so now we actually have to communicate with consent and and also a lot of this is. We haven't seen people's mouths in so long in person that even seeing a mouth close up is going to be a little shocking for some people. I think what. I've heard from some of my friends who are dating again. They're like i feel like. I'm dating from scratch and learning everything from scratch. Like gone are the days when someone just goes in for the kill it like. I can't even imagine if someone that now without asking. Oh my gosh you be like hell no get away. what are you doing. yeah. I went to get like a to go drink. Because that's all that's open in the skylight like got really in my mind and my friends face. I was like this was so it appropriate like he was interacting. Like you used to do back in the night and now you've this the memo here that you just can't do that anymore. Oh no. I don't want someone touching me at all y. Like especially if we have no we haven't had any like dates or any reporter like just someone ran him at a bar like that is now happening. You know get away from me. Even stand to be. I came and watched those scenes. You know when people are too close together. I'm like oh my god. This person just spitting on the other person's face. I mean i think bars and clubs and all that stuff i mean we can go into a hold of the rant on that so we'll save that for another day but i think those are going to look very very different than they are today as well and maybe in twenty twenty two. It will come back. But i don't think twenty twenty one will have the same like social interactions and venues that we once did. Yeah and i think just how we explained that the in real life dates will be the coveted date and with the ramp up. I think it's the same with the kiss. I think there's just going to be a lot of ramp up to that. I kiss because you've got to have a conversation. I young quarantine. who have you seen. Are you seeing other people. Happy be physical with them. These conversations you gotta like check the boxes. Are you go tump to tongue some or even request a test like vigorous like a lot of things that you could do that would make i mean the testing's never one hundred percent but it's still going to give you a better sense then if you have nothing at all. I more comfortable absolutely absolutely. That's it that's our top five predictions for twenty twenty one. I feel pretty good about this list. Of course yeah. Just like twenty twenty. There were a lot of surprises along the way so who knows what else i know. We're like oh yeah we got it because we know where we're coming from but who knows nope in two thousand eight hundred twenty twenty vision we got this and then everyone's like Twenty percent fuck that she. We re some of the predictions Let me read some of them. Some really good ones. We were able to kind of put some of them in. But i thought this was interesting. And i totally see this from nicolay cove engagements break up and there were some comments on this one. Basically how you know. A lot of people have been entering relationships because of loneliness in they may realize when the vaccine calms or were out of this that they don't necessarily really love this person or like them. They're just didn't on convenience so that doesn't happen to people. But i could see. I mean. I think there'll be some that aren't some that are just like any other break-up well i think back in the day when people interrelationships recall it the sunday test. Could you spend a whole sunday with this person doing nothing but now people are entering relationships with the quarantine tests. Could i imagine quarantining with this person for months. And that's a much higher hurdle to to get over. Yeah i mean. I think that he's saying the opposite though although they've been you know now when things open up again. There's going to be all this temptation and you're gonna look at your partner and be like did i really wanted. I want us. But i also see what you're saying that like it could actually be a much stronger foundation. I think it really comes down to like. How much are you using. Didi to fill a void are using it like because you're just lonely and you need anyone or you're using it like the quarantine tasks like i'm going to be super selective with who i let in euros ones will probably be the ones that last hopefully hopefully What about this one. I think Yen said i think once people are vaccinated. There'll be a lot of a way dates to get out of town. No more like a netflix. And chill at home and conflicted about this one. Because now i realize. I'm i'm such a homebody so a perfect date for me. Now is no longer adventuring in peru for perfect date for me is being a home selecting a movie drinking a nice bottle of wine julie.

00:40:08 - 00:45:13

By the way. I started drinking wine. Which is what you injuries. Why now it's it's a big leap for me. I love it. I love it so i don't know i'm conflicted about that one so you wanna go to wine country. Don't you ought to get out of the house like i. I don't okay. So i i agree. I've never been a homebody. I've never described myself that way. But over this time. I have not really minded that aspect that much and i'm like wait. Maybe i am more introverted than i ever thought but that being said i was like with my friend did. She like literally throughout the worst. I've far in san francisco. She's like dot and let's just remind you that before covid. We're like we would never be caught dead at the bus stop. She's like what are we give to go to the bus. Stop right now. That i think sums it up because i think about it all the time. Like what would i give to. Just be at like a bar touching like interacting with a date. The way i use to back in the day. I wanna go out like i do want to do all this stuff so i see where you're coming from on this one. Can we just paint the picture for bus. Stop because i feel every city has a. It's called the bus stop. You're already kind of get a sense of how janki this places because it's supposed to be like face don't stay. You're just there to wait for here. Bus to go to the next place. The bus is a place where you go and your feet are immediately stuck to the ground. So you know it's dirty dirtiest fuck and my first experience of my first and only experience at bus stop. Was i caught to like twenty. Some year olds doing line to the bathroom. And then coming out be like and then the other like go to more coke so they went back and did work. Okay i was like awesome good for you. And then the third aspect of bus stop is nobody ever goes. Hey what are you doing tonight. Do you want to go to bus. Stop. it's not like you know it's not a product. You're not like planning your night around bus. Stop you're just like you're drunk. You are desperate. You're horny and you go. where should we go. I'm bus stop. Hey you know what that sounded pretty good to me right I'm just kidding. I'm really zero to ever go. The bus stop. But i would love. I would love to take a trip right now. I think also that. I mess. Like i think i don't know i mean i think you can do that even in covert worlds like you can do wine tasting do that. But just because it's always smarter more hassle okay. We're like a little out of tangent here. But i think this is a good one but i think even if the vaccine let's say god forbid gets delayed and people like like we do spend all of twenty twenty one similar. I think people are craving to do stuff. And i think that's why you've seen like an uptick in road trips and going to national parks and doing stuff and i do think that's going to continue. I think just being at your house. Twenty four seven is really wearing at people's mental health. I agree that people are gonna wanna be on the move. But maybe they each their own like you are saying. Then you look at the housing market because julie you know unlike on the market for a house or whatever. And they're saying millennials are buying more single family homes now because they want the yard they want the private space shrew thinking that they're going to be homebodies for a long time. I do wonder once vaccine is out. Will they regret their purchase. Decisions of buying these single family homes. I totally did. I was talking to my mom about that. She's like the home prices in our like suburban town of been like. It's hard to get a house the like. Do you really think these people want to be there when things open up again like yeah city suck right now because nothing that is there for a city i mean i really want to say that because i do think there's actually still a lot you can do in a city like dining was pretty fit phenomenal when it was happening. Yeah but i what draws people to cities once that's available again. I think people will be able go back right. And then they'll all be all these like a foreclosed homes in the suburbs because people just don't want to pay for them anymore. That's what i think. Chris says i'm thinking people might get used to dating from a distance and take more time to meet up in person. Yep that's what we pretty much talked about as well. I like this one from a lenzi. People aren't going to be as superficial comes to seeking their friend for the end of the world. Yeah amen to that. I love this quarantine test. I think people should make sure that they apply that. Because i think that will really go back to what was said. At the beginning of the entering. Something out of loneliness like if you look at it. It's almost like empowering it away to be single right now if you're not feeling like that of rolling 'cause you're like i got this and anyone that comes into my life is an added benefit and i think if you can do that and you're like i spend day in day out with this person doing nothing even when things are available and make the mundane shit fun than that's really a good sign of someone to enter relationship with as someone who has survived a quarantine relationship.

00:45:13 - 00:49:43

I gotta tell you. I never thought about a relationship as taking care of someone else. I thought it was just mutual like for each other and you have fun and do things together a companion activity partner but this has been eye opening for our relationship where i've had to take into account someone else to take care of not to just think about them so they take care of them and do meal planning and to think. Are we missing toilet paper at home. Those are like not fun things to do. But you gotta do when you are in a relationship right right so there are you relationships. Do you really want one. Which hey that is a billion dollar question. I mean i think like sometimes of like i would love to have that and i've had like kind of a few things in this time but i feel like sometimes i'm like i really do crave connection again in that other times of like actually buy a on my own path. Yeah like beat your job so it comes in waves for me. I think the right person though that can survive the quarantine tests than it's definitely a more added value. Yes i like. That cool are right. We're going to wrap up this episode again. If you like to participate or even watch our most debatable 2021 competition join our facebook group love in the time of corona. we're taking applications until mid january and we'll be making decisions on the final candidates by the end of january. What is the cutoff day one. Thirteen one thirteen. But you know what it depends on when you listen to this episode if you happen to join after one thirteen and you're still interested. They're still some time. Okay okay maybe one fifteen these waltz. Cutoff is now gonna be like wait. Ivanesevic biological one fifteen is our ultimate cutoff date. But it's gonna be great. It's going to be great. In the winner of the most adaptable twenty. Twenty one competition will win all kinds of swag and possibly a guest spot on our podcast. So there are a lot of upsides to this competition and you get exposed to our entire community and you never know who's out there you never know you never know if you love us and because we love you please give a good rating in apple podcast. We really appreciate those. Were up to four hundred reviews. Now good for us. I know amazing and we have some really phenomenal guests in store for season twelve. I still can't believe these twelve. It just feels yeah. How did they happen. We're almost like episodes this crazy. But i think anyways that helps us get these guests because they look at it they see that where legit helps us. Rise to the charts. This year we were able to get to number. Four was our peak position on relationships or like after brunei brandon. Michelle baba like. I think he's done. We screened shot at it. Because we're like this is. I don't even know what to say. I've definitely gonna like. Hey get up at a poster by room as you should lamb shit raymond. Let's even for one hour. If that's the case that's something to memorialize for sure and help us get. Saddam was so we are ahead of them. That would lifelong dream. Yeah because then we can get the as guests on our show like. Don't you wanna be on the rest podcast right so you see that word. Upper what. I guess it does help. So thank you for everyone. That's done that already. It's make such a difference to us all right. We're going to wrap this up as we do. Always stay thin. No dateable podcast is part of the frolic podcast network. Five more podcasts. You'll love at frolic dot media slash. Podcasts won't continue the conversation. I follow us on instagram facebook and twitter with the handle asked dateable podcast tag. Any post with the hashtag. Stay dateable and trust us. We look at all those posts then head over to our website. Dateable podcasts dot com. You'll find all the episodes articles videos and our coaching service with vetted industry experts. You can also find our premium y series where we dissect analyze an offer solutions to some of the most common dating conundrums roseau downloadable for free. On spotify apple podcasts. Google play overcast stitcher radio and other podcasts platforms. Your feedback is valuable to us. So don't forget to leave us a review and most importantly remember to stay dateable.